Showing posts with label original work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label original work. Show all posts

Friday, August 30, 2013

Finding Home

This song was written almost 20 years ago.  My friend Des and I tried to put in an arrangement, but for some reason we could not agree on the form of the song, and eventually I abandoned the idea of recording a demo.  I've forgotten some of the parts in the verse, reconstructing this entirely from memory, so I put in new lines to freshen up the piece and tinkered with its structure.  Hope to sing it again soon.  Also, how time flies.

THIS HOMELESS HEART

Please wait for me, don't ever let me go.
This homeless heart has nowhere else to go.

Home is where the heart is
But I haven't found my only love
And all these walls that keep me in
Are all as cold and dark as the stars above.
Where will I find the shelter
That I know within your arms of love?

Home is where the heart is, they say.
To keep you warm when then sun goes away
For so long the dreams have kept me 
Alive --- and pushed me through
But dreams do fade they fly away with time.

Love is something that you'll find at home
Where you'll feel never be alone
But where is home when I'm away
So far --- from where you are
Though we're apart our hearts just beat as one.

Home is where the heart is
But I haven't found my only love
And all these walls that keep me in
Are as cold and and dark as the stars above
Where will I find the shelter 
That I know with your arms of love?

My home is where you are
And my heart lives in your heart
If I can find the courage
To bridge the miles that we're apart
If only time would be our friend
So all my days would be with you
And no more words need be spoken
To show my love is true...

Home is where the heart is
You're the one and my only love
And all these walls that keep me in
Are as cold and and dark as the stars above
Where will I find the shelter 
That I know within your arms of love?

Please stay with me, don't ever let me go.
This homeless heart has so much love to show.

Thursday, August 08, 2013

Iffy

If wishes were notes I would have written a symphony
If kisses were like feathers they would scatter through the skies
If silences conveyed meanings I'd willingly go mute
If only moments spent waiting brought me closer to you

If mere lines on a page could awaken a bright day
If the world skips to the beat of a heart beating in time
If a song can be heard between a wink and a smile
If the miles we are distant means moments standing still

If true hope means surrender, and if faith brings reprieve
If the questions find answers and at last are complete
If all lies and all truths can be bridged with fresh views
If our memories are a Present, never fading, ever new.

If all that is known, or is knowable is revealed
If each breath that we take means another we will share
If each longing is caressed and reaches safe harbor
If only one second of loving validates our existence.

If only what I have to tell can finally be told.


Saturday, May 25, 2013

Because I Feel It. Because It's There.



This can only be ersatz poetry because it's so sincere.  Hall and Oates would have been apropos as well, but that ship has sailed and a song once dedicated cannot be taken back.  It's that quiet, buoyant confidence in the lyrics that deceives the listener that it isn't serious - but listen to those lines again:

"That's why I've got to be there
Got to be there where love begins
And that's everywhere she goes
I've got to be there so she knows
That when she's with me, she's home."

That's a feeling to which I wish I can awake.  It's that depth of feeling that rounds this life with purpose.  For now it's by proxy.  Just wish that my scene would soon be up.  I know I wouldn't know what to do.  Yet I believe that "I will be there" for that loveliest of mornings.

If I could only wrap around these words
The nature of my feelings
Or the silences even more profound
I will shower the universe with this bounty
I will dance with joy unbound.

If I could touch you with my intentions
Like a mother's care for her child
With worship so unspoiled and pure
I will paint the heavens with rainbows
I will rock your world for sure.

If there is nothing more left to give
Even bound in all the cliches -
My heart, my soul is yours to take
I will be lifted in sweet surrender
In the dreams your touch will wake.

If this world reveals such perfection
Such as only expressed in you
There is nothing I will find amiss:
Your lines, your scars - they make you beautiful
And I will heal them with my kiss.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Much for Nothing, Alas

Too much noise going on
Too much running around for what's new
Not much to do by hanging around
Not fun if it's time without you.

Too much store in knowledge that dies
Too many toys, too many things
In the end they don't mean too much to your heart
When your heart is no longer whole.

Too many lights to hide the darkness
Illuminated and yet rendered blind
Too much ego and mole-hill building
No time for "us", only for the "mine."

Too many lies that we tell ourselves
Life would be great if we had so much more
Yet so much of life have we forgotten
Too far have we gone from shore.

Too much spent for the unimportant
Expecting love and joy to be free
When treasures of life have been thrown away
Everything else becomes dross.


*The year-blog goes on hiatus until I select a better time to get it moving again.  Sometimes even when there is so much to be said, staying quiet is the best thing to do.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Wish and Hope, Pray and Weep

I wish there could be something said 
For the consciences of those with good intentions
Not that I have surfeit of any. 
Still, it would be nice to know 
If I could turn my life around 
On the strength of wishes and prayers. 


We all know very well 
That faith may grant us the reprieve 
To sleep soundly at night - 
But tomorrow, our quandaries still exist
Nothing has changed from the time we slept, 
Nothing has come about from wishing and hoping. 


Sometimes, though, the state of mind we have 
Prepares us for the inevitability of failure -
Saying, "such was not meant to be."
It was a nice ride, but one ends up with nothing 
Nothing to show for the depths of despair fathomed 
Nothing to show for the power of miracles expected 
Nothing to show for the oceans of tears shed. 


Life can sometimes be awfully cruel
That the things we enjoy are signs of her kindness. 
Against the stark bleakness of loneliness 
Truth, Love and Beauty find spaces to bloom. 


Before we latch on to passing fancies 
Or future glories that we will someday reap
Never let the slow escape of air from our life 
Overtake us, and leave us gasping us air 
Wishing and hoping, praying and weeping 
That we will never be condemned 
For the sins of our apathy and neglect.

Thursday, July 07, 2011

Solemn, Fail.

The thoughts themselves have faded into the cracks,
Stilled, unseemingly by the mind eager to please.
The morning runs at inspiration have run out of breath ---
The evening jaunts into ecstasy have gone haggard and dim.
Such lies we feed ourselves, never setting foot on truth's hallowed ground
Once the exuberance of ignorance palls, night comes a-stealing
Taking the wonder and smothering it with worries and dreams.
For dreams push ever forward, ever taking us from the moment
While worries burden us with the convenience of the mundane.
That tail of starlight will leave us eventually feeling flush
But when we close our eyes the dream offers no comfort
For life, ever constant and ravaging, invades our helpless nest.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Gayunpaman, Salamat

Makatagpo man ng kabiguan
Panindigan ang pagkakamali
At gayunpaman,
Salamat, Panginoon
sa dumating na pagkakataon
sa dakila Ninyong biyaya ng buhay
Ng pamilya at kaibigan
Ng saya at kalusugan
Ng mahimbing na tulog
At paggising sa bawa't bagong umaga.

Hindi magwawakas ang buhay
Patuloy pa rin ang ikot ng mundo
Magsanga man ang daang tinatahak -
Manahimik lamang at maging banayad
Sapagka't naghihintay lamang ang kapalaran
Upang ating hulmahin
At bigyan ng kabuluhan.


Seven months after I had let my heart go free of this place my body is finally physically leaving Saudi Arabia. Saturday evening, barring any hitches, I would board the plane and fly back to Manila.

I have struggled to harden my heart like stone but it is impossible.

Just as it has become the fount of my sorrows, this land and the people I have met in it are forever the source of my joy and my complete personhood.

I harbor no bitterness for the mistakes I have made and while others may deplore the consequences of my actions, I thank them for their concern. Life presents odds and ends to the stories that we write for ourselves. Today's episode may end badly, but faith and hope teach us there is always tomorrow.

After all, through all the difficulties and challenges of life, we are still here. I am still standing. And as long as I am here, I might as well get on with the rest of my life.

Sure, it can get scary. But that's the fun in it. If everything were handed to us on a plate, we'd stop appreciating the beauty and complexity of life.

The Good Book says, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" The lesson for me is - I don't have to understand. All I have to do is close my eyes, make a wish, and believe.

Balot man ng pighati at kaba ang puso ko ngayon, gayumpaman, salamat. Nagpapasalamat ako sa bawat sandali ng paghahanapbuhay ko rito. Salamat nagkatagpo tayo at naging bahagi ako ng buhay ninyo.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Surviving Saudi Arabia, or the Economic Laws of Expatriate Employment

(Note: This entry was inspired by a speech delivered by Robina Gokongwei-Pe, journalist and entrepreneur, at the commencement exercises of the University of the Philippines-School of Economics, April 25, 2008.)

I have just celebrated my five years in Saudi Arabia, and while this may not be a worthwhile milestone to my seniors who have been here longer, it is also a significant milestone since this is also the longest I have spent with a single company.

Through the ups and downs of my employment here, including my weight and my waistline, the main quality that has allowed me first to endure, then to enjoy, working outside my native land was the value of persistence. So it is said, “Persistence is the twin sister of excellence. One is a matter of quality; the other, a matter of time.”

In persisting against the difficulties of working in a different culture with several other nationalities, the lessons of schooldays past have impressed upon me the unique situation which befalls expatriates in Saudi Arabia.

Given this world climate where institutions among our top corporations and banks have collapsed in the face of recession, I also would like to share these lessons with you, and you can verify it against your basic Economics textbook.

#1 THE LAW OF SUPPLY AND DEMAND – The standard law of economics, it is simple to note that the demand for affordable workers, plus the continuous supply of higher salaries being paid here than in our home countries, have made employment in Saudi Arabia. While this gives us the confidence that we expats will always have a place here, this also means that this demand, while still strong, may not last longer than we think. We have a joke among my colleagues in Human Resources that he who supplies the money can make all the demands.

#2 THEORY OF COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE – This leads us to the second rule – competitive advantage. In order for us to retain the demand for our services, we have to continuously upgrade our own skills, not only in our given profession, but more importantly, in the way we communicate and present our ideas. Being in Toastmasters, among other things, can help us sharpen that edge.

#3 COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS – We all know that there is a labor market out there that is calling out to be filled. However, even if there is sufficient demand, or even if there is competitive advantage, there are built-in costs to changing jobs. For those who recall their choice to work in the Middle East, the transition entails so many sacrifices.

For those who have no families here, being without family is a hardship many cannot endure. For those who do have families here, flexibility is now a premium.

For those who think that they are moving to a better position with higher pay, the uncertainty in this world market gives one very obvious lesson: today you may be in a better position, tomorrow your company may close. Conclusion: if you are in a stable position already and are experiencing sufficient work satisfaction, there is no need to change jobs, no matter how high or attractive the offer may seem.

#4 THEORY OF OPPORTUNITY COST – The next rule is closely allied to the previous one. When considering our careers long-term, we would always consider the packages being offered to us. A better package from another company is an opportunity to make more money, but taking the first offer means we will lose out on better offers that may come along. Or leaving this job means losing the opportunity to be promoted six months down the line.

In the past few years, I have noticed so many people readily switch jobs, going from one company to the other in a virtual criss-cross of the Gulf countries, sometimes not even completing their contracts. One lesson future employers will note here is that this kind of employee cannot be expected to stay. No employer will dare hire a perpetual nomad, because he will think the employee will leave after a while.

This now leads to Rule # 5 or LAW OF DIMINISHING MARGINAL RETURNS – After so many years of moving around, you have gone down in market value, because you have not steadily built a career. You may rake in quick gains, but in the end, your long-term value as a professional will diminish.

Finally, there is rule # 6 or THEORY OF MARKET COMPETITION – Building a career requires a combination of hard work, patience, and oftentimes, just good old-fashioned luck. However successful we may get, we still cannot be too comfortable. We still have to learn new things. We have to face challenges that did not exist in our work environment before. And sometimes, there are just others who will take what we have worked so hard for away from us, fairly or unfairly.

What to do with that? Nothing – it’s just a reality of life. Thriving with competition makes us better competitors – whether at work or in public speaking, or even in talent shows. We compete because this world is based on competition, but at the same time, as long as we are focused on our objective the quick wins are not as important as the long-term victories. We get by as well through cooperation and collaboration.

Surviving in Saudi Arabia is not only for the expatriates, but for the Saudis as well. This is a lesson they can learn from the professionals who have helped build their country.

Persistence, patience, and curiosity – they are among the tools we can use in furthering our careers. Remember, whatever works for you, your career is only one component of your search for happiness. But that is a story for another day, and for those colleagues who have persisted despite the odds, or because of them – congratulations!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Padayon sa Pabrika

Walang kasintamis
Ang tagumpay ng pagpapawis
Ang amoy ng usok
Ang kaluskos ng makina

Hindi man ako ang siyang
Obrerong nagsisikap at naghihirap
Ramdam ko ang sikdo ng kanyang puso
Dahil ako'y hingal
Sa pag-akyat ng hagdan
Papuntang opisina

Minsan aking nakalimutan
Ang halaga ng paghahanapbuhay
Sinayang ang aking oras
Sa gawaing mali ang landas

Sadyang ganyan ang ating buhay
Hindi maiiwasan
Ang ganid
Ang sinungaling
At matapobreng amo
Lahi man natin
O iba

Wala mang dagliang
Dahilang makapagsaya
Ako'y nagpapasalamat
Ang trabahong siyang tunay na grasya.
Tulad ng mga nagbabanat
Ng buto at kalamnan
Tuloy sa padayon
Dito sa pabrika -

Sa pabrika ng ideya
Magpapanday ng sariling layon
Kahit di maaninag
Ang liwanag ng umaga

Friday, July 04, 2008

The Last Rays


The Last Rays, originally uploaded by Spocker.


PILGRIM'S THEME (Bukas Palad)

Tired of weaving dreams too loose for me to wear
Tired of watching clouds repeat their dance on air
Tired of getting tired of doing what's required
Is life a mere routine in the greater scheme of things

Through with taking roads someone else designed
Through with chasing stars that soon forget to shine
Through with going through one more day - what's new
Does my life still mean a thing in the greater scheme of things

I think I'll follow the voice that calls within
Dance to the silent song it sings
I hope to find my place
So my life can fall in place
I know in time I'll find my place
In the greater scheme of things

Each must go his way, but how can I decide
Which path I should take, who will be my guide
I need some kind of star to lead me somewhere far
To find a higher dream in the greater scheme of things

The road before me bends, I don't know what I'll find
Will I meet a friend or ghosts I left behind
Should I even be surprised that You're with me in disguise
For it's Your hand I have seen in the greater scheme of things

* * *

For Yours is the voice in my deepest dreams
You are the heart, the very heart
Of the greater scheme of things


* * *

Why don't we follow the voice that calls within
Dance to the silent song it sings
One day we'll find our place
For all things fall in place
For all things have a place
In the greater scheme of things.

(Shot at Boracay June 2008 --- the song captures some of my mood and it's very singable as well.)

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Our Angel


Snickery, originally uploaded by Spocker.

There's this ancient smile
That lights up the lines of his face.
It's a smile without meaning
(Or perhaps, layers of meanings within meanings)
A smile that defies the ages.

The hope that flows from him
Is clear and refreshing with innocence.
It's hope that knows no darkness
(Or maybe, seeks light beyond the corner)
A faith firm and unshaken.

The world unfolds before him
And tomorrow for him does not exist
Today is his moment, and as it goes past
He follows with the joy of the now.

Then time will awaken
And spread before him her sighs
Then the forever that he holds within
Will cease and break into pieces.

There's this boy whose life is God's giving
And life could never be more sweet.
It's the boy who cries affection
(Or maybe, spreads love like he spreads his wings)
And suddenly, my life is complete.

(For my nephew Jeremiah Angelo -- I wasn't there when he was born, and I won't be there on his birthday in August. If it's hard on me, I can't imagine what it is like for his father.)

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Isang Pamulat

Sa simula ay nilikha ng Diyos ang mundo
at sinugo niya ang tao upang magsilbing tagapag-kalinga
nang mapanatili ang kagandahan ng kanyang nilikha.

Subali't sa paglipas ng panahon . . . nakalimot ang tao.
Pinabayaan niya ang lupa,
ang kanyang kapwa,
at ang kanyang sarili.

Nalunod siya sa pagkilos ng isang mundong masikip at nagmamadali.
Inabala niya ang kanyang sarili sa kamunduhan.
Nalasing siya sa pangako ng tagumpay
At 'di niya napansin ang kanyang paligid . . .
na mayroong hindi maganda
na may taong hindi makahabol
na may mga taong hindi masaya
na may mga taong hindi malaya . . .
May takot,
at nangungulila.

Sa harap ng kahirapan at pagkukulang
Sapat na ba ang mangakong may liwanag sa isang mundong sakop ng dilim?
Sapat na ba ang sumigaw kung walang nakikinig?
Handa ba tayong imulat ang ating mga mata sa katotohanang
mayroong ngang nangungulila
at naghahanap ng liwanag . . .
Na may mga taong nag-iisa, natatakot, nalulungkot
at naghahanap ng unawa
sa isang mundong madaling makalimot?

Tumigil ka nang sandali . . .
Huwag ka munang magmadali at makipagsiksikan.
Masdan mo ang mga mukhang nasa iyong paligid
At baka mapansin mo . . . na marunong din silang tumawa
at kumanta
at makiramay.
Marunong din silang magtanong
at kumilos. . .
Na baka kailangan lang nila
ay isang gabay,
isang liwanag, na magpakita sa kanila
na sila at maaaring magbigay-liwanag din
hanggang sa ito'y kumalat at dumami

. . .at mawala ang dilim sa mundo.

(An old piece circa 1995, c/o my buddy Robert with some verses from me -- I don't remember which --- for the Peer Counselors of La Salle Lipa High School. In keeping with the recent tragedies in the Philippines and China...sadness wells up in my heart.)

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Dapithapon


Dapithapon, originally uploaded by Spocker.

KANLURAN
(Gary Granada)

Nag-aawitan ang mga magsasaka
Nagsasalitan ng tula at kanta
Naghihiyawan ang tagadalampasigan
Nagsasayawan ang mga mangingisda
Ang namamasukan sa mga pagawaan
Naglalabasan at sila'y tuwangtuwa

Palubog na, palubog na
Ang haring araw sa kanluran
Pauwi na, pauwi na
Ang haring lawin sa kanluran

Nagsasayahan ang mga may kapansanan
Kababaihan at mga mag-aaral
Ang mga kawal at alagad ng Sambahan
Ang makasining at mga makaagham
Ang mangangalakal, guro at lingkod ng bayan
Nagkakaisa sa iisang inaasam

Palubog na, palubog na...

Pauwi na sa kanila ang haring agila
Ang ibong mandirigma sa kanluran


Sunset at Boracay Beach.

In no way does the song match the mood of this shot, but I'd like to think that in times of old when the workers of the land rest their limbs and call it a day, this is how it would look.

Anyhow, I'm not exactly in an agit mood right now, though there is always that wish that when we find peace, it is not merely the absence of conflict but the achievement of genuine harmony.

The Lord Cometh...


The Lord Cometh..., originally uploaded by Spocker.

One of the stained-glass windows at Jaro Cathedral in Iloilo.

This was a classic point-and-shoot with my sister's digicam. The sun's rays were hurting my eyes, so I just centered the image on the view screen and gave it a pop.

Even after the viewing I wasn't convinced it would look this good. I could have done better by resetting the output to actual prints instead of VGA, so that the resolution would be higher, but as it is, this was a lucky shot. What a blessing.

Monday, September 03, 2007

Spreading A Little Happiness


Spreading A Little Happiness, originally uploaded by Spocker.


If you've never been thrilled to the very edges of your soul by a flower in spring bloom, maybe your soul has never been in bloom.
- Audra Foveo

Oh for flowers in bloom here in this desert summer!
Life's mystery keeps on unfolding
And our moods ebb and flow with the season
For a flower to awaken our happiness from slumber
Is our great solace from the womb of mourning.

Oh for flowers that bring memories of sweet kisses!
We may never go back to those times at all
And they only exist in corridors of the mind
For a flower to make whole all those broken pieces
Is courage's miracle that is never too small.

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Rescued from the Trunk...

I just had to post this, for old times' sake. Back in the day, doing lectures for the SHARE guys was an exercise in pompousness - I can't believe I originated most of the statements here. But then again, we did take the process seriously, or at least that was our verbalized intention. Those were the days I was the resident factotum of the organization - doing the write-ups, etc. etc. so stating the obvious was just par for the course.

(Small voice: You had no life then, Chief. Um, oh yeah, you still have no life now.)

And yes, of course, I miss SHARE. It's celebrating it's 25th anniversary on the 15th.

Glad to have been part of it. Still hope it was around...

And on to the lecture:

GUIDELINES FOR INTERVIEWERS

A. Interviewing Purpose

The purpose of any interview is to get as much information as possible from the subject in relation to one's need. This is why there are job interviews, news interviews for coverage and for features, interviews for surveys. The bottom line of each interview, then, is information. No matter what kind of impression the interviewer may have of the applicant, if there is no supporting information, then the interview is insufficient.

B. Interviewing Personnel

The personnel involved in interviews really depends on the balance of people who need to draw the information from the subject, the nature of the decision to be made on the matter, and the actual number of people available for, and capable of, administering the interview.

In SHARE, the normal procedure is to have three people per applicant. This makes sure that there are several views available of the interviewee and at the same time, there will be no deadlocks should the interviewers disagree. This also removes the need for another interview and deliberation follows after the interview. However, in the absence of people available to interview, the two-member approach is preferred. Interviews done by one person are subject to debate, no matter how the rest of the organization trusts the judgment of the said interviewer.

C. Preparations Prior to the Interview

The interviewers must understand the kind of standard to be used in the interviews. In this manner the interviewers may place additional emphasis on particular matters, such as communication skills, time, etc. This would also affect the duration of each interview.

The panel must also have a set-up as to who will be in charge of the interview and be responsible for keeping it organized. The rest of the panel will be there to support the main interviewer's goals. The interviewers must also agree on their roles, i.e., who will draw out, who will throw the main question, etc.

It will also be helpful that prior to the interview, the interviewers would have already reviewed the applicant's application form. This will be vital in drawing up the interview approach and will also give the panel ideas on what questions to ask.

The panel must also be prepared to take down notes. This will assist other SHARE members during deliberation in evaluating the participant. These notes will also serve as reminders to the interviewers of their impressions of the applicant. Each interviewer must take note of his/her impressions immediately, even if they don't come out as organized as one would like it to be. While the panel may assign someone to be secretary, each interviewer must still take down notes.

C. Interview Approach

When interviewing an applicant for SHARE, there are no axioms or fixed formulas involved in the procedure. The interview may choose any approach; i.e. being poker-faced and strict, being friendly and accommodating, being terse and distant, etc. Take note, however, that one's approach constitutes about 50% of the effectiveness of the interview. The applicant must appreciate the importance of being at one's best during the interview, and at the same time, be as open and sincere as possible. It is the main interviewer's responsibility to create this kind of atmosphere. He/she must discuss this with the rest of the interviewing panel.

D. Interview Format

The interview may be divided into two parts. The first is information gathering, where the entirety of the applicant's pertinent information is reviewed. The application form's format is already covers a lot of the information needed for the interview. All the panel has to do is explore such information. This will then lead to validation, which covers going in-depth into the answers of the applicant. The interviewer is advised to exercise his/her critical thinking/analysis of the answers and how they relate to one another and to the whole of the impression that the applicant is making. One may be wrong, which is why it is important to write down both what the applicant is saying and what is one's impression of the applicant. These are two different things. While the deliberating panel will respect the interviewers' impressions, being there on the scene, there must be proof of these impressions.

E. Some Guides for Deliberation

These are some of the guides/important things to take note of:

1. Interest

1.1. The applicant must have interest in the organization, either through this application or through previous associations with other organizations. The primary related fields the interviewer should look through are the following :
1.1.1. facilitating in seminars
1.1.2. counseling/self-help
1.1.3. teaching/tutoring
1.1.4. outreach/community development
1.1.5. religious groups

1.2. Involvement in performing (singing, acting, etc.) groups is also positive, but is not a primary consideration. We must see the participant in the short-term, because a long-term involvement is not dictated by any forces but that of the individual's interest.

1.3. An applicant with no experience whatsoever but has the sufficient interest and willingness to invest in S.H.A.R.E. is also very welcome. In fact, these applicants are more welcome than those who have prior experience and were referred to us but don't really have the necessary interest in the organization.

2. Time

2.1. Gets there on time for the interview. This is a good starting point to see how the participant is taking the interview seriously. At least he/she has managed the time well enough to be there for something important.

2.2. Has time to devote to the organization. The ideal would follow this situation: is not a major officer in another organization, no pressing academic or professional requirements, no major commitment to be with the family on weekends, no major relationships/commitments. The ideal of course has exceptions; the balance must weigh out in favor of participation in S.H.A.R.E. While we must respect an individual's credentials with other organizations, it is with S.H.A.R.E. that we should see these credentials validated. A non-participating skilled member will be negative in the short-term and may not mature in the long-term.

2.3. Knows how to manage time well. This is where we see how the individual manages his/her time among all the many commitments he/she may have. What is a good measure? See how much the individual gets time off to attend to hobbies and other pursuits. If the applicant is interested enough, S.H.A.R.E. can squeeze into this free time.

3. Willingness to be trained. The applicant must have the willingness to have another point of view presented to him/her. This especially applies to those who have received training in our kind of work (i.e. from the LSGH Peer Counseling Organization) or have a different frame of reference that we have (those who come mainly from non-Lasallian schools). The applicant must have the kind of openness to the training method, meaning he/she can maintain attentiveness throughout a set of lectures, and also be willing to undergo structured experiences.

4. Communication skills. The applicant must have the capacity for self-expression.

4.1. He/she must be capable of verbalizing his/her ideas and feelings; if necessary, to carry on and gets his or her message across. Fluency in English is a plus, but not a prerequisite, since we also conduct our activities in Filipino. Fluency in both languages is ideal. Academic excellence is not an automatic precursor of verbal skills.

4.2. The applicant must also know how to listen. Though listening skills will be part of our training program, the applicant must also evince these skills. At least we wouldn't have the problem of maintaining the applicant's attention during the training. Listening skills also enhance the applicant's ability as a facilitator and most especially as a counselor.

4.3. Third, it would also be advantageous for the applicant (and for S.H.A.R.E.) to have writing skills. This is an asset since we need creative minds in developing our programs. Other artistic skills are also a plus.

5. Stability in personal and family relationships. The applicant must have a considerable amount of stability; meaning he or she must enjoy healthy heterosexual relationships, and have a stable circle of friends.

5.1. Though the presence of a fixed peer group (barkada) is not necessary, it can help in the applicant's emotional maturity. This, however, may result in a set of conflicts/freedom of identity once the applicant becomes a member. The interviewing panel must be wary of this.

5.2. In family relationships, the applicant must have a healthy relationship with parents and brothers/sisters, because this helps in forming a well-adjusted and integrated personality.

6. Work ethics and etiquette

6.1. Humility. Can work with others, is a team player, knows how to live up to a certain role.
6.2. Professionalism. Can differentiate personal and work issues; adheres to conventions agreed upon; can accept constructive feedback and criticism.
6.3. Service values. Is willing to give of one's time and ability for no reward of personal popularity or material gain. S.H.A.R.E. will not be a group simply to make friends or to have people for leisure activities alone.
6.4. Diligence in preparing written work.
6.5. Can maintain seriousness. Can distance oneself from one's emotions from the work at hand, stays in focus.
6.6. Ability to empathize. Related to service values. The applicant can see it from the other person' side.
6.7. Flexibility. The applicant can adapt to different kinds of people and situations, and if necessary willing to get his/her hands dirty in order to accomplish the job.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

The Magic Feather

The happiness of a man in this life does not consist in the absence but in the mastery of his passions.
-- Alfred Lord Tennyson

Our Division contest came and went just about last month. This isn't much, but I'm rather proud of how this speech went. There are some inaccuracies that some people might spot, but it's a rather good speech, I think. I'll come back next year with a better performance.

The Magic Feather

I hold in my hands a magic feather. Do you see it wave like this? I can even throw it in the air, I will spin, and then catch it. See?

Mr. Contest Chair, fellow Toastmasters, distinguished panel of judges and guests, good morning.

I picked up my magic feather habit from one of my favorite animated movies of all time, Walt Disney's Dumbo. (Well, I confess, I still love watching cartoons to this day.)

Now, Dumbo was an elephant, who happened not only to be undersized, but he also had a huge pair of ears. He was ridiculed by all his fellow circus elephants except his mother.

Little did they know that Dumbo could fly. However, he had a teensy-weensy problem: he didn't believe he can. He lacked the faith that he could do something which no other elephant could. To help Dumbo out his little friend Timothy Mouse gave him a feather, which had nothing special about it except this: it gave Dumbo the belief to fly.

All throughout the next few weeks, Dumbo trained with the feather. He started with small heights and later worked on going higher and higher.

Then came the big day when Dumbo was featured as the main attraction in the main ring of the circus. He was raised on the platform more than thirty feet from the ground. On his way up, he was brimming with confidence. Then something disastrous happened - he lost his feather! What was he to do?

He stared down, looking at the ground, looking at the audience, his knees shaking like a tree dropping leaves. His friend Tim spoke to him and told him he didn't need the magic feather. Along the way, something wonderful and magical happened. Dumbo started to believe. He started flapping one ear, and then the other. He took one step, and then another, and finally he fell off the platform!

At twenty feet from the ground he was flapping, and he was falling! Ten feet, he was flapping, and he was falling! At five feet his ears picked up the pace and he zoomed upward, to the delight of the crowd!

There's a little Dumbo in every one of us. We have the little fear inside us that only needs a little push, perhaps a magic feather to start us on the road to greatness.

What do you fear? --- What do you fear? ---- What do you fear? Our fears may be of failure, of ridicule, of loss, of death.

You and I all share one thing: that we fear the uncertainty of the future.

My magic feather moment came when I was selected to run for grade school president. I dreaded the experience because it exposed my one great fear: facing people in public. I stuttered and couldn't complete two straight sentences. I ate my words. We went class-to-class talking to the students, and I found it hateful. The last day of campaigning - the miting de avance - came, and all three of the parties had to speak before the entire school. My leading opponent was a natural-born speaker, while I quailed at the thought of doing my speech.

In those moments, what I remembered were my parents' encouragement and their assurance that they loved me. So I took a few steps forward, slowly ascended the podium, and delivered my speech.

It was horrible, and I lost by a huge margin, but the experience stayed with me that I worked harder on my public speaking skills. I became a trainer and a teacher.

All of us fear. Nelson Mandela once quoted poet Marianne Williamson, “our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure. So we might ask ourselves, who are we to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? My question is, who are you not to be?”

Ladies and gentlemen, there is a light that shines within us that is yearning to break out. When we share this light with others, we give them permission to overcome their fear. We give them magic feathers of confidence to acknowledge the beauty in their lives.

When we liberate ourselves from our fear, we automatically liberate others.

I present you your own magic feather!

If you are not criticized, you may not be doing much.
-- Donald H. Rumsfeld

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Something Sappy


Your hand I hold in mine touches me to my heart
I want to share the very air you breathe
I long to know the deepest secrets of your life
You are to me life's greatest mystery

Each word you say fills the space of my in-betweens
And all new thoughts awake to glory in you
No past exists, no future stops the moment now
You wash away my lies, my tears, my shame

How can I thank you for my life
When you're beyond perfection
How can I show you what you mean
When my words lose meaning
You are the dream that every road life leads me to
How can I thank you for being you?

You took my hand and led me to your paradise
You gave to me a reason to believe
You looked at me and with your gaze you understood
All of the best things inside of me

Each day with you is joy enough to last my life
My woes, my cares, my fears - they disappear
You gave me everything that I would ever need
Beside you is where I will always be.

Here is my life - I give it up to you
My mind my soul
My faith my trust in you
Here is my heart - its rhythm is your beat
For you gave me wings
And taught me to be free...

How can I thank you for my life
When you're beyond perfection
How can I show you what you mean
When my words lose meaning
You are the dream that every road life leads me to
How can I thank you for being you?


* * * * *
Dear Lord, how can I thank you indeed?
Should you will it, may I at least give back the very best of what you have given me to the one who'll share my life and with me walk the rest of life's road.
I'll end this day of work with a smile and with words singing your praise on my lips.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Pag-Ibig Kailanman (Apat na Sulok ng Pag-Ibig)

Lahat tayo'y naglalakbay sa mundo
Naghahanap ng sulok na aangkinin
Naghahangad, nangangarap
Minsa'y nalilimot na ang ating damdamin.
Mapaparisan ba ng liwanag ng buwan
Ang ilaw ng iyong puso?
Mailalapat mo ba ang sukat ng iyong nais
Sa kabilugan ng mundo?

Ang tugon sa ating dasal
Daliri ng Maykapal
Nananatili sa mga nagmamahal

Kung ayaw mong tumangis
Huwag mangarap kailanman
Kalimutan ang pag-ibig
Kung ayaw mong masaktan
Ngunit kahit ilang ulit mo siya'y talikuran
Siya lamang nagbibigay sa buhay ng kabuluhan
Magunaw man ang buong sansinukuban
Mabubuhay ang pag-ibig sa gitna ng kawalan.

Kung dala ng paghamon ay pangangamba
Manalig at huwag mabahala't wala itong lunas
Magsikap at magpunyagi pag-ibig ang manatili
Sa araw-araw na landas.
Makakaya mo bang itatwa sa 'yong buhay
Ang sikdo ng iyong puso?
May kabuluhan pa ba ang 'yong tadhana
'Pag tuyo na'ng damdamin mo?

Kapag ika'y nagmamahal
Sa hirap may maisasakdal
Ang luha mo ang siyang nagpapabanal

Ang hinahangad mong katuparan
Sa lahat ng iyong inaasam
Nasa piling mo't kumakanlong sa iyo.
Pawiin mo ang piring sa mata mo.

Kung ayaw mong tumangis
Huwag mangarap kailanman
Kalimutan ang pag-ibig
Kung ayaw mong masaktan
Ngunit kahit ilang ulit mo siya'y talikuran
Siya lamang nagbibigay sa buhay ng kabuluhan
Magunaw man ang buong sansinukuban
Mabubuhay ang pag-ibig sa gitna ng kawalan

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Thunks...

These few lines are just works in progress. I can't call them "thoughts" because they are part of bigger ideas that are percolating in my mind. So I call them "thunks." Maybe I will come up with bigger ideas based on them -

Pilipina
Dakilang tagapagkalinga
Inaalila
Saan man ika'y mapunta
Hirap iyong binabata
Pangarap mo'y ginhawa
Lahat na'y nilimot
Pati ligaya


I am thinking of writing an agit piece (where did that part of me go?), this time reflecting on the state of the Filipina - caregiver to the world. Not only does she have to struggle with less opportunities (families always giving preference to the boys), but along the way, she has to cope with privation, loneliness, and even death either as a contract worker or a contract worker's dependent. Then there is the usual double standard.

Of course, I also have a small cautionary statement in the end - something that goes like this:

Sa kabila ng iyong sakripisyo
'Wag sanang masilaw
Para lang maging banyaga
Ang iyong apelyido...

Truth of this matter is, some Filipinas pay back their sacrifices by considering themselves successful when they marry foreign husbands. I don't mean to generalize, as I do know very nice Fil-Foreign couples. But sometimes the highest aspirations of many of our countrywomen is to become foreign chattel (witness the growth of the mail-order bride industry in Mindanao and in the Visayas). An old oppression for a foreign one. Yes, at least one will be comfortable doing it. A monumental roll of the dice, and all things considered, values do get skewed in the face of really hard times.

Still, I am hard-pressed to believe that desperation overtakes plain, simple greed.

More on this, Insh'Allah, assuming I finish it.

* * * * *

Must you be bad so that you can be cool?

I had a recent rant on this and it goes back to my thoughts on life and relationships. People with more anima normally have this edge about them, this kind of knowing of having gotten through difficult times and survived. So our society goes about with its means of algesis, integrated into formal or informal rites of passage. You have the hazing rites for the Greek-letter organizations, the so-called "hell week" to break in froshes into the system, the collective oppression in ROTC.

Funny, but I always thought of these in moral terms. This moral "breaking" is more important than the physical one.

So back to my first statement - do you really have to bad to be cool?

Is it really cool to know the ins and outs of sex only to find that you have been jaded as to its purpose and its emotional content?

Is it really cool to get high on the latest drug and say, in the most bored manner, "I've done that, I've had better?"

Is it really cool to be on the opposite side of the law, or of authority?

Life IS really stacked with rules. I can understand why people would want to break free of them, just as Harry Haller talks about the decay resultant of the mediocrity of bourgeois society in Hermann Hesse's "Steppenwolf." So yeah, get rid of middle-class sensibility, let's all go to live as our more primal selves, primal being more true, and thus leading to the next stage.

Once, I thought like this. There comes a point, though, when all the rebellion can be so tiring.

Is being cool so desirable, then? Many people look at each individual, and oftentimes the mass dismisses those who conveys sensibility, preferring to recognize "the free, the savage, the untamable, the dangerous and strong." So, being bad can be cool. No matter that the progress that we have been accomplished along the principles of order, refinement, restraint, and logic.

My only fear is that many of today's youth, particularly in Western societies, feel a pressure to make something of themselves, and find no compass to guide the way. There is no challenge to be overcome, and all the ghosts have been dispersed by special effects and gimmickry.

So, instead of the edge being the means, gaining it becomes the end - a road that leads eventually to self-hate and mutilation. This mutilation does not have to be physical - sometimes the moral ones are even more deep-seated. I fear, many of our youth in the Philippines, even desperate to climb out of poverty, see the veneer of wealth first rather than the value of earning it. Privilege and status before probity and responsibility.

Hence, star-search reality shows and the "Wowowee" debacle. It was bound to happen, anyway, sooner or later.

"Rebel without a cause" does ring a damning accusation for our society. In this vacuum, the extremist, the rabble-rouser, the demagogue, the spin doctor will prey on us and leech from us our very lifeblood. Bush, bin Laden, Hamas, the Iranians, the ranks ranged with and against Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo are all faces and manifestations of this problem.

Without a cause, we are driven by the next person who dares to drive the bus, no matter that he be blind or does not know the way. Still we survive. Only God knows how long the host will last and eventually languish and die.