Kneeling at Starlight

Uncomfortable memories - INQUIRER.net

I just had to post this. Wonderful commentary on the state of the Philippines by a non-Filipino ...
There are depths of faith required to commit to the building of a new Philippines. For the longest time, I thought that the faith would be enough.

But it isn't. There are just too many Juans and Marias, myself included, looking out for number one to make it happen. There are so many "opportunities" to make things better, but at the same time, we should be looking beyond earning (and spending) the next paycheck.

There are also the petty jealousies, unkindnesses, the venalities that somehow get blown out of proportion. God knows I've done my own share of these things, and sometimes, even when I express my own share of contrition some people just don't get it.

Of course there is still hope and forgiveness. And then, there is also despair. Is it me, or is it them?

It reminds me of this poem my editor in our high school Filipino magazine wrote. He is kneeling by starlight, making his wishes among the stars. For the myriad stars in the firmament, he has hopes and dreams. Kneeling by starlight, he hopes for things that he knows will hardly come true. Yet, he knows, he will keep on coming back, letting his hopes gather like so many reflections of starlight that pass through his fingers ...

I also read this week Pope Benedict's comments on Mother Teresa's despair on the silence of God. Now this woman has gone through both personal and collective tribulations (with her flock) in the course of her life, and my woes compared to hers are a mere teardrop in the depths of the ocean.

Maybe I'll stop being a petty person or maybe I won't (or maybe I'm giving myself too much blame, whatever) - it's in my hands to do as I must, for good or for ill, but these uncomfortable thoughts, these disturbing memories should keep on driving me to do better.

If such things like our personal dramas are beyond our repair, what good then will come to our native land?